Mine! It's one of the first words that children seem to learn. In their defense, little children must feel a great sense of power when they finally realize they can hang on to something, that they can resist having it always taken away. But, one thing seems clear to me now- much of life is learning how to let some things go willingly. Especially things.

The Savior taught (Matthew 5:40-41):

40 And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloke also.

41 And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain.

I imagine a world where when a man stumbles into town down on his luck, he takes someone's coat. The owner steps forward and offers his cloak as well.

This world is not only for fiction. It's real. This type of generosity happens every day in places all over the world. But, there is too much of selfishness and greed, as all know. All I can do for now is turn the searchlight inward and see where I can improve, where I can be more kind and generous. It's a great place to start.

When I was a boy, there was a television advertisement for a hair care product. The ad featured a woman with beautiful hair, and the narrator describes how this happy customer told two friends about the shampoo. And, they told two friends, and they told two friends etc. The phrase “And they told two friends . . .” was repeated several times with two voices being added to the narrative each time.

One of the signs that indicate we are sincere in our belief is when we share it. In fact, by its very nature, it is impossible to have a testimony of the saving power of Jesus and not share it.

The Book of Mormon contains the record of an ancient people who became totally depraved. But, later on they became converted to the Lord once again. The prophetic writings describe how they worked diligently to bring others to the truth:

Helaman 15:6

“Yea, I say unto you, that the more part of them are doing this, and they are striving with unwearied diligence that they may bring the remainder of their brethren to the knowledge of the truth; therefore there are many who do add to their numbers daily.”

One of the touchstones of true faith is the strength of our sharing. In so doing, our own faith grows. God really cares about only one number in the grand plan: One. He works with people one by one. But, he rejoices in the chorus of many.

Uniforms. Badges. Stripes. An engraved nameplate. These things all indicate credentials. They are certainly important. But, they are not pre-requisites for leadership. Leadership requires no titles, no credentials. Everyone reading this has the potential to be a leader- to show the way. The leaders I respect and follow have shown remarkable consistency in the following areas, among others:

• Motivated by an overarching goal in the best interest of all
• Kindness
• Selflessness
• Sacrifice
• Patience
• Ability to teach

Surely, the list could grow even longer. But, even these traits are enough. Jesus came without any badge, certification, or special privileges. He was born in the lowliest of circumstances. To the eyes of many, he was just another guy- the average Joe. Their reaction was, "Who does this guy think he is?"

He didn't think he was anyone. He knew who he was, and he was bold about declaring it. He once read to the people a scripture in Isaiah that prophesied of his own life. He concluded and then (Luke 4:22-22):

21 And he began to say unto them, This day is this scripture fulfilled in your ears.

22 And all bare him witness, and wondered at the gracious words which proceeded out of his mouth. And they said, Is not this Joseph’s son?

But, his personal witness and was equaled only by how he boldly showed who he was.

Each of us has all of the credentials we need to follow him and to, in turn, be leaders. We’re children of God.

I dread being misunderstood. Most people loathe it as much as I do. Yet, how often do we truly listen to those who are speaking to us? I was in a meeting today and two of my co-workers whom I sincerely respect had great points. They each wanted to make sure they were heard, and they were emphasizing their points in a professional way. In the end, I’m sure each left the meeting sure he was rightly heard. How comforting that is.

I recall a few special times when my mother gave me all of the solutions I needed by just listening to me describe my problem. She was wiser than I knew. My mother-in-law has a listening pose- a visual way of putting people at ease and assuring them that they are being heard. It's not a technique- it's a way of approaching life.

God likes to be understood. I am not sure I have always given Him the attention He deserves. Being a good listener is difficult if we think we have all of the answers. The Lord says (Doctrine & Covenants 19:23):

"Learn of me, and listen to my words; walk in the meekness of my Spirit, and you shall have peace in me."

Listening, learning, being meek and teachable- these are paths to peace. They lead to peace not only with our co-workers, family, friends, and associates, but also with God.

It is easy to collect crowns. We live in an age when praise is not so hard to find- and too often it is offered for what deserves no honor. But, there comes a time when these things no longer matter, if they ever did. Ashes and diamonds- foe and friend. We are all equal in the end.

I recall my younger years when I felt nearly indestructible. But, time has convincingly taught me rather differently. As the years pass, I find it easier to recognize how small I am in the grand scheme of things. And, yet it has not diminished my sense that somehow I'm important. I am pleased to bow before the Lord. I'll be glad to cast at His feet any crown I may have acquired. Not because He needs it- but because no one does when the Man comes around.

Revelations 4:10-

10 The four and twenty elders fall down before him that sat on the throne, and worship him that liveth for ever and ever, and cast their crowns before the throne, saying,

11 Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honour and power: for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created.

I was talking about parenting with a friend last night, and it was clear we shared common ground about how to exercise discipline in the home. My mind is called back to the time when my wife and left the hospital with our first newborn baby. I had previously spent plenty of time around children. I’d babysat my nieces many times. I knew the basics. But the child was never my ultimate responsibility. There was always a mother or father that resumed the pilot seat in what I could tell even then was a rocket ship of parenting. But this time, I was startled with the realization that I was the parent, the one who was buckled in for the ride no matter what could happen.

One of the hardest things is when a parent expects one thing and a child wants to do something else. This is a fairly perpetual state, I think, even in families where things go pretty well. It’s called growing up. But, the lessons learned in bridging that gap in expectations are useful in many situations. How we get kids to do things that are, after careful analysis, necessary? There is no simple answer, and I’m no expert. But, what I have learned in raising five sons is something I learned long before I had children. It comes from Doctrine and Covenants 121:41-42:

41 No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned;

42 By kindness, and pure knowledge, which shall greatly enlarge the soul without hypocrisy, and without guile—

It is not enough to say, “I’m the boss. Do what I tell you to do!” Persuasion, gentleness, meekness, love, kindness- these are not usually in the corporate training or parenting manuals. They’re not always easy things to show when the power struggle is on. But, they are often the way out.

(I read John 1:1-3 and some other prophetic text yesterday, but I lacked the time to put together the blog entry.)

T.S. Eliot famously said that “…history is a pattern of timeless moments.” My mind is flooded with such thoughts today- the history I’m making- a purposeful print left on melting snow or a drop of water slung between two waves of the sea.

Eliot goes on to say this:

We shall not cease from exploration

And the end of all our exploring

Will be to arrive where we started

And know the place for the first time.

Through the unknown, remembered gate

When the last of earth left to discover

Is that which was the beginning;

At the source of the longest river

The voice of the hidden waterfall

And the children in the apple­tree

Not known, because not looked for

But heard, half­heard, in the stillness

Between two waves of the sea.

As I reflect on these things, I usually turn to the Psalms, and I find myself repeating their words like a mantra (Psalms 119:89-94):

89 For ever, O LORD, thy word is settled in heaven.

90 Thy faithfulness is unto all generations: thou hast established the earth, and it abideth.

91 They continue this day according to thine ordinances: for all are thy servants.

92 Unless thy law had been my delights, I should then have perished in mine affliction.

93 I will never forget thy precepts: for with them thou hast quickened me.

94 I am thine, save me; for I have sought thy precepts.

Time. I have never felt like I have less than I do now. It has never flown by as quickly as it does for me now. But, these are mere perceptions. We all have competing demands, and we feel pulled in many directions, but the amount of time available is the same for us. How is it best spent? While there is nothing inherently wrong in the act of parking in front of the television for a favorite show, we hopefully do so only after having carefully considered the question: What should I really be doing now? Sometimes, the right answer is, in a sense, "Nothing." We all need time to decompress. But, these should be punctuations, commas and pauses, in a larger conversation that is our worthwhile and dignified activity in life. Each of us is writing a story by our actions. Is it transcendent poetry or compelling prose. Or, is it a mere soundbite or, at worst, tragic graffitti that merely says the equivalent of, "I was here"?

The Prophet Joseph Smith received an important revelation (Doctrine & Covenants 81:4-5) wherein he declares:

5 Wherefore, be faithful; stand in the office which I have appointed unto you; succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees.

4 And in doing these things thou wilt do the greatest good unto thy fellow beings, and wilt promote the glory of him who is your Lord.

I've reversed the order here, because the message just flowed that direction for me this morning. There is so much good that we can do. Often, our simple smile, a kind gesture, an expression of thanks, or thoughtfully listening to a friend or a child can make an enormous difference in the lives of others. We may take them for granted, but there are many in desperate circumstances who will appreciate our love more than we can perhaps know.

So, as we reach for the remote- let us not be overwhelmed with how much we haven't done. Rather, let us be overcome with love, delay or cancel that appointment we made to "veg out" and instead make the phone call extending forgiveness or take whatever action will do the greatest good while we are able. Time does not guarantee us tomorrow.

John.

I was reading recently about how many billions of emails are sent each day, and of those billions an astonishing majority of them are what we call spam- broadcasted, unwanted messages, many of them leading to some sort of harm. When they are not preying upon the public’s naiveté they are attempting to appeal to a person’s desire for riches, power, popularity, and prurient things. These weaknesses are of course not new. But, never has there been a time when they are more pervasively marketed to the human race. Messages that suggest you are only as good as what you wear, what you own, how young you look, how lofty your title, or how with it you are arrive not only in one’s inbox but they are nearly forced upon us and occupy even our casual gaze as we drive to our homes. With large screens mounted right in the console’s of our fancy vehicles we can not only impress our neighbors but know where they are and how far below they are from us in real time.

But, other messages are more enduring and ultimately more redeeming, appealing to what really matters inside all of us. The prophet Alma crashes the red-carpet party with this startling declaration:

Alma 7:6

6 . . . I trust that ye are not lifted up in the pride of your hearts; yea, I trust that ye have not set your hearts upon riches and the vain things of the world; yea, I trust that you do not worship idols, but that ye do worship the true and the living God, and that ye look forward for the remission of your sins, with an everlasting faith, which is to come.

Jesus Christ redeems God’s children as they follow him, trust him, rely on him alone. This means making a conscious, serious, and challenging commitment to turn one’s gaze heavenward, away from the neon and a false sense of well-being to what is everlasting. This is repentance, and it is a beautiful thing. Receiving grace is a beautiful event. God, grace, makes true beauty out of ugly things. The decision is up to us. He has sent the message and is waiting for our reply.

I had quite a temper when I was a boy. I suppose this is not entirely uncommon. I’m raising five sons right now, and sometimes they can be impulsive. But, they are much more patient than I was at their age. So much of life is learning to be patient. As a baby, time has perhaps little meeting. We want. We need. Any delay is quickly announced with an unmistakable cry. As we grow older, we learn that we are not the only thing that matters. Our scope of the world grows broader. Life has a way of teaching us patience one of two ways: the easy way or the hard way. I have learned in both ways.

The prophet Alma teaches some truly comprehensive principles where patience, humility, teachability, and other traits are all brought into close proximity.

Alma 13:28-29

28 But that ye would humble yourselves before the Lord, and call on his holy name, and watch and pray continually, that ye may not be tempted above that which ye can bear, and thus be led by the Holy Spirit, becoming humble, meek, submissive, patient, full of love and all long-suffering;

29 Having faith on the Lord; having a hope that ye shall receive eternal life; having the love of God always in your hearts, that ye may be lifted up at the last day and enter into his crest.

Opportunities to meek, humble, patient, full of love, and long-suffering come to us every day. In its simplest, it's when we are following a slow driver or waiting for a cashier who is just learning the job. More complex is when we are dealing with family or friends who are seemingly throwing their lives away. I believe in the power of prayer. We cannot change others, but we will surely grow as we do all we can for them and patiently wait on God's own due time.

We all know someone who is in trouble in some way. Over the years, I have known people who have found themselves in great difficulty. My own life has been harmed in different ways in the past 40+ years. Sometimes, these difficulties are of our own doing. Other times, difficulties come because of the actions of others. In both cases, God has the power to heal. As I was praying this morning I was thinking about some of the people I know right now who are troubled. Some have been gravely hurt by others, and that was worrying me. I thought of brave women abandoned by husbands, children hurt by adults, and the list goes sadly on. But, as I thought on these things, I felt a reassurance as a whisper came to my ear: “I know my sheep.” I know that this is God’s way of telling me in unmistakable terms that He is firmly in charge.

Each of us is known to God- just as a loving and nurturing mother and father knows their own child. Because I believe in an infinite Atonement, I can trust that even though terrible things happen to people in this life, He has a way, in the grand eternal plan, of healing people perfectly. I cannot say how all of that works, how it all happens, or when God will finish the job. But, my faith is firm that it nonetheless will occur.

In 3 Nephi 18:30-31, the Savior is teaching that we should not isolate people, push them away, unless they are a clear and present danger to His children.

30 Nevertheless, ye shall not cast him out from among you, but ye shall minister unto him and shall pray for him unto the Father, in my name; and if it so be that he repenteth and is baptized in my name, then shall ye receive him, and shall minister unto him of my flesh and blood.

31 But if he repent not he shall not be numbered among my people, that he may not destroy my people, for behold I know my sheep, and they are numbered.

There is plenty of tragedy in the world. It can overwhelm us when we try to take it all in. We may be tempted to think that God slipped out the back door and threw away the key. But, it is not true. I have never found a simple, easy, sound-bite-friendly answer to the perplexities such as these. But, faith is not for the impatient and impulsive. Time takes time.

John.

I often need encouragement, but not always from people. The scriptures in Isaiah are sweeping in scope and very inspiring. But, they were written in one of the most precarious and troubling times in the history of Israel's posterity. Isaiah was writing around 750BC, and he warned over and over again that the tribes of Isarel would be swept out of the land if the people did not repent.

Isaiah 52:1-2

1 AWAKE, awake; put on thy strength, O Zion; put on thy beautiful garments, O Jerusalem, the holy city: for henceforth there shall no more come into thee the uncircumcised and the unclean.

2 Shake thyself from the dust; arise, and sit down, O Jerusalem: loose thyself from the bands of thy neck, O captive daughter of Zion.

These same verses are echoed by the new world prophet Moroni as he concludes the tragic record of a people that has self-destructed, much like their forebearers in the old world: Moroni 10:31. Moroni had followed Isaiah's example and given the people plenty of warning.

My friends, this is real leadership- telling people what is sometimes hard to hear. Each of us has faced a situation where we felt the need to give timely and appropriate counsel to people, but we knew very well that it was tough love. Our inclination is to hold back because we don't want to hurt those we love. This is not a bad impulse. But, it must be tempered with an equally important desire: to bless others by telling them the truth. It is only in the context of truth that people can truly grow. I have received such advice, tactfully given, by people who really cared about me. It has blessed my life. I have also given such advice over the years, and I can only hope it had similar effects.

Best,

John.

I appreciate the comment left on my blog about yesterday's scripture. So many scriptures are beautiful and lifting. I need the regular boost. Truth is serious business, but it is beautiful business all the same. My passage for today is from Psalms 5:1-4 & 7

1 Give ear to my words, O LORD, consider my meditation.
2 Hearken unto the voice of my cry, my King, and my God: for unto thee will I pray.
3 My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O LORD; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up.
4 For thou art not a God that hath pleasure in wickedness: neither shall evil dwell with thee.
7 But as for me, I will come into thy house in the multitude of thy mercy: and in thy fear will I worship toward thy holy temple.

I feel gratitude today.

John.